My Sister, My Friend

I miss you, my sister, my friend
Where have you gone?
"Nowhere," you say?

I remember how we used to talk
About boys and romance
And weddings and God

Then he came along, stole you away
Why have you gone so far away?
"No one," you say?

I tried telling you to take it slow
You said that you would,
Then, that I didn't know

I couldn't keep my mouth shut,
Couldn't agree

After all, you asked me for honesty

I guess you only wanted Madame Honesty
When she agreed with Senor Hormone
And we both know they don't speak.

 Now we don't speak
I wish things were different
I wish you'd come home

I heard you're tying the knot
Heard I'm not supposed to know
Good luck to you and to beau

I remember when we talked about weddings,
Said we'd always be there
No matter how far, in foul weather or fair

Well you've gone far away and still live in town
I just can't believe how all this went down
I guess you're still lost, hope soon you'll decide to be found.

Lead Me

    About a month ago, I read a blog posted by my sister (Honestly Seeking Honesty) and it's actually stuck with me for a bit; I just can't seem to get it out of my head.  One of the things she said was something she'd actually stolen from our mom: "I ride my own white horse!"  That's totally true!  If you think you're going to stop me from going into battle, chances are, you're going to be sore in the morning.  Also, I don't need to be rescued...I've already been saved.
  
     I don't want a man who expects to be my savior, nor do I want him to worship the ground I walk on.  I don't want someone who just really wants his mama.  I want a partner. I want to spend my days with a man (not to be confused with the ever-popular but oh-so-disappointing man-boy), one who will fight with me when I can't win alone.  One who will stand up and be a protector when there's danger.  A man who follows God  and has the guts to stand up to me when I'm wrong, a strong man. 

 Then I heard this song for the first time in a while.

So, like I said, this has kind of been rolling around in my brain for a while.  My sister's conclusion was that, although she doesn't have her eye on anyone, she feels like she's ready to be in a healthy, mutually beneficial relationship. 

Mine is: I know what qualities I'm attracted to, but I'm not ready.  I don't think I have much to give at this point.  I would probably be more like a parasite than a partner right now.  Someday, I know I'll meet him.  But for right now, I guess I'll just have to keep waiting until God brings him into my life and makes me ready for the grand adventure.